There's that bump! I actually took this last week sometime but it's basically the same as now. So, it'll do. I am for sure feeling done with being pregnant. I want to feel myself again, I want my clothes to fit, I want to be able to do every day things that I feel I can't do anymore. I want my energy back, to be able to bend over, sleep on my stomach, and to be able to walk without feeling like I'm going to pee my pants. I don't mean to sound whiny or ungrateful, but, I'm pretty sure every pregnant person gets to this point at some time. The closer it gets, the more emotional I find myself. In a good way though. I think it's the fact that she's like actually a little baby in there and her moves and kicks are so much stronger that it makes it just very very real. My belly is large and I can watch it just roll with baby girls movements and kicks which is just awesome to watch and feel. I find myself crying happy tears often because while going through infertility, I got to such a low point where I seriously thought I would NEVER get to experience this. It being here, and having it now just weeks away makes me feel so blessed and just happy that I will be able to experience motherhood-the thing I've wanted my entire life. I can't wrap my head around it sometimes. Something interesting that I want to note, I don't know if it's just me, or if all people that have dealt with infertility feel this, but, I often have a cloud of guilt hovering over me. I secretly love all the stares I get when people's eyes go to my belly, yet, I often wonder if any of those eyes that stare are eyes of people that are going through what I had gone through. I always wonder what people are thinking. Is she dying inside because she wants so bad what I currently have? Are people thinking, oh look, another prego, (it is rexburg, a highly family populated city), are people excited or happy? I just remember back when dealing with infertility that any time I saw a pregnant woman, I could not help but get super jealous or sad because I SO badly wanted to be in their shoes. I will never know what lives these people live or what trials or hardships they have or are facing, all I know, Is that, I wish so badly that I could take the pain of hurt, sadness, and hopelessness away from any person that struggles with infertility. I sometimes wonder what made me so lucky to experience this and why this couple that's been struggling longer than we ever did still isn't. God's plan is interesting. I for sure have had my eyes opened because of going through this trial and wonder if not having gone through it, if I would be as aware to others as I am today. Anyway, I know that's kind of all over the place, but I wanted to jot down my thoughts.
I did have a doctors appointment last week along with another ultrasound. Everything is looking perfect. My belly itself still measured a couple weeks ahead, but the ultrasound looks right on track with everything, so they aren't worried at all. The ultrasound showed that baby girl has some hair! I was dying! The tech said it looked long already too. haha I'm super curious what she will look like! Even if she came out a baldy, I will still be thrilled. But, if she came out with a full head of it, I will probably just die over it! It's the hairdresser in me ;) She also is measuring in the 50th percentile for everything. So seriously, just perfect. I know ultrasounds have been wrong with babies weight, but I also know that they are right a lot of the time too, so with that being said, she was 1 oz shy of 4 lbs! And this was last Thursday. So if that's the case I'm sure she is a little over 4 lbs now. Crazy! I know of a few babies born at 4 lbs if not smaller. I'm SO grateful and just feel so blessed. She has the hiccups a lot, which, to be honest, are slightly obnoxious in my opinion. Caleb was able to feel them the other morning which I loved, but, poor thing! I hate hiccups and I feel like she either gets them like 3 times a day or none at all.
My baby shower is Saturday and I think we have most of it planned. It's mainly last minute things we have to do. I'm hoping it flows well and that what we have planned will be fun for our guests. I'm not a huge party person so I mainly want to keep it short and sweet.
As for news besides baby news, nothing. Haha. Pretty much same old same old.
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