Unexpected move = hectic week

FYI, this is a LONG long post, and if family reads this, just know we are not angry and that we are content with our decisions. No hard feelings. Oh man I don't even know where to begin. I guess we'll start way back. So, me and Caleb have been living in his grandma's basement apartment for the past 4.5 years. It was a 2 bedroom 1 bath apartment. Because it was his grandma's place, it was already completely furnished before we moved in. It had already had 3 beds set up, couches, kitchen table, tv, everything. So when we moved in, we already had all our own furniture as well. To make it work, we squished all of her furniture into one of the bedrooms along with a bunch of our stuff and storage and everything else. So, needless to say, the place was very crammed from the get go. The place worked well for us and helped us save TONS of money as she let us live there for free. Well, when we found out we were expecting, we were pretty close to buying a house, but for one reason or another, things kept falling through. As time went on I was feeling very stressed as to how we would make room for a baby in this apartment. And yes, I was even thinking logically and trying to figure out how to get by with just the basic needs until we moved to a house. Well, long story short, we ended up talking to his grandma about putting her stuff, mainly her beds and maybe a couch and anything else we needed too into storage so we could make room for a baby. We knew buying a house now where it's so close to this baby coming wasn't ideal so we were now to a point of just holding out on house hunting till after Christmas. That way we could put all our focus on this baby and holidays. Buying a house is such a HUGE thing so we didn't want to take it lightly and just jump on the first thing. His grandma said that would be fine and that she didn't mind us staying there for just a few more months. That was a huge stress reliever because we now knew we had a place to at least get us by till we got into a home. It was still overwhelming because it was still going to be very squishy, but we had it all planned out so that it would work. So over the course of a few weeks, I had cleaned out my dad's storage unit to make room for the stuff that was going to go in. Me and Caleb took several days of DEEP cleaning/ dejunking out both rooms of the apartment to get things moved out to the storage unit, made a huge D.I. trip with a car load, filled up several garbages, ya know, huge project type stuff. It felt great doing a huge deep clean like that but it was rough on my body as I am pretty pregnant. Fast forward a couple weeks. After lots of phone tag and clashing schedules, I was finally able to get a night where my dad could come with his truck to come help haul these mattresses and other big items to take to the storage. The night prior to them coming, me and Caleb got everything ready that needed to be hauled out. Our living room and hall no joke looked like a horders house like on T.V. It was FULL of just things that was getting hauled/ baby stuff that didn't have a space to go to till the big stuff was hauled out. You couldn't even open the front door, you had to use the back door.

(we had another mattress in our tiny hallway, and all the metal frames in the other room still)

Saturday was the day we could haul stuff out. My brother ended up coming up from Idaho Falls to help since when they could come, Caleb was at work, and I'm not much help at the moment. I was SO grateful they took time out of their schedules to come help us out. Well, here's where it got a little awkward. My dad and brother show up at the apartment. They come in and are amazed that I have not been lying with how crammed we are. They got right in and started loading up the mattresses. My dad's truck was loaded with all the mattresses and they came back in to figure out how they were still going to get the metal frames to fit on the truck. It was then that I got a phone call from Caleb. When I saw his name on my phone I thought it was weird because he was at work and he's typically very busy. I answered the phone and instantly I knew something was weird by the tone in his voice. He said, "Hey, sooooo, I have to tell you something, and it's super awkward, but I need you to have your dad move the mattresses back. My grandma called me and changed her mind about her being ok with them going into storage. Basically, we need to move." After me being so confused and him not really wanting to say more till he got home, I instantly got SO angry and over the top stressed. I didn't really know what more to say other than, "k." I got off the phone and I could not hold in my tears. First off, I was SO so mad. I get it. It's her house, she can do what she wants with it and can have whoever she wants or doesn't want there. I was stressed beyond words, and I was extremely embarrassed as I have not ever cried in front of my brother, and probably not in front of my dad since I was like, I don't know, 16 or something, let alone full blown ugly cry. I couldn't hold it in. I took a breath and talked through my tears and said, "I'm very sorry, but we apparently have to put the mattresses back." They both were kind of confused and didn't really know what to say because I was basically sobbing at this point. I told them I didn't know exactly what was up other than his grandma changed her mind and wants them set back up down here. After a minute of basically just staring at each other, back in came the mattresses. I could tell my dad and brother felt bad, but they're guys, not sure what to do or say, and I was to the point I just wanted to be left alone so I could get my ugly cry on and have my own pitty party. Dad knew we had been house hunting but he just kept saying that "we'll find you something Shalei." Well, they ended up leaving and I went to the bathroom to sob. What in the world are we to do now? We have no space, and I mean NO space. We have no where to go. This baby is coming in a matter of 5 weeks and heaven forbid she could easily come earlier than that as we all know that babies come on their own terms. It will not work here and from the sounds of things and vibes we got, we were to not be there any longer. I doubt we could find, buy, and get into a home before the baby, I doubt we could get an apartment that week, let alone one that allows our Libbie. We literally had nothing. I wouldn't have been so stressed if a baby weren't coming, but, because she's coming very soon, I was a mad, completely overwhelmed hot mess. All while I was in the bathroom I hear my dad come back into our apartment. I go out to see what's up and he apparently called a realtor and told me to grab my things and that we were going to go look at a house. I clearly had no interest at the point because I looked like a hot mess, but we went anyway. The house wasn't far. After looking at it, it was a definite no go. My dad drops me back off at my apt. The day goes on and I sat on my bed since there was no where else to sit. I got on my laptop and looked for homes for sale. I searched every site, kept my options open for every home, everything. Caleb finally got home around 5 that evening. He too was quite upset and had the same feelings as I. I will leave out all the drama filled stuff. After talking for about a half an hour, trying to realistically see what our options were, and talking with my parents over the phone, we decided that our best option at this time was to move to my parents house until we could find a house. We talked how we could make room for this baby to come and that way we could still go with our original plan of holding out on house hunting till after the baby was here and the holidays were over. My little bro, (bless his heart) said we could take his room since it's the biggest in the house and would work for our room plus some baby stuff. So, like I said, after about half hour of talking, we decided that's what we needed to do and that's just what felt right. We started boxing things up right away as we were planning on moving out the next day where my dad had the truck and no one was working and would be able to help us move. So, the boxing began. I was already emotionally exhausted but we spent the rest of that night boxing up our apartment. Thank goodness we already had a WHOLE ton of boxes we had saved since we thought we were going to move months ago.

Where Libbie hung out while we boxed things up.

Taking a small break from boxing.

Sunday morning came and the move began. I am so incredibly grateful for my family. All my siblings helped pitch in to help us move. I tried my absolute hardest to not lift anything, but I was on my feet the entire day still boxing and helping out and carrying things that weren't heavy. By the end of the night, we were feeling pretty done. We still had a ton to box up and move but we were calling it a night. Thank goodness. My back and feet had had it. I was exhausted. We set up our bed at my parents so we at least had something to sleep on that night. That wraps up Sunday.

Monday, Caleb took off work because we still had a million things to do. We had an appointment with an insurance broker that morning to set up insurance for both Caleb and this baby when she's born. After the appointment, we grabbed subway for an early lunch, then headed back to our apartment to continue boxing and moving. That took up the rest of our day. After our last load for that night, we were so wiped and hungry, so we decided to stop in at Juds for dinner. It was a fun little dinner date with Caleb.

Tuesday, Caleb had to work the day shift. So I spent ALL that day trying to organize our room and unbox things here. I also had to do our laundry since we were out of clothes. When Caleb got home that night around 5, we made the couple trips back to our apartment to continue moving and now cleaning our apartment. It was another late night.

Wednesday, I hit 35 weeks pregnant. Caleb had to work again, so I spent the whole day again still unboxing and getting things organized here. By the time he got home, we both decided to stay in that night and just rest up since we had a big day again on Thursday. We only had another load maybe two to move and then we just had to finish up cleaning. So we decided to stay in for the night and just sit and rest up a bit.

Thursday, Caleb had taken off work so we could finish up what we needed to move, plus we had some errands to run. We slept in that morning which was SO needed. Caleb's body was sore from all the lifting, moving, and him still working through the week, and my body felt just so pregnant. Mainly my back, hips (ohhh my poor hips) and feet were just done. After finally getting ready for the day after a late start, we headed down to Idaho Falls. We had to run to the bank, then went and pre-registered and took a tour of the hospital we are delivering at.

After that, we took ourselves out to a late lunch/early dinner at chuck-a-rama. We hadn't been there in years and we both were kind of reminded why haha. After we ate, we then headed to Rexburg back to our apartment and finished up there. We were able to pack EVERYTHING else, and finish cleaning the place. We had completely finished there and said goodbye to the place we had lived in for the past 4.5 years.

What a hectic week it's been. Between boxing, moving, unboxing, cleaning, appointments, and errands, we are completely wiped. 

Now about moving in with my parents. I don't want to sound selfish here but I know it's going too. First off, I am grateful beyond words for my parents and family letting us move in with open arms. We took my brother's bedroom and we re arranged 3 rooms to make it work here for us, our baby girls' stuff and plenty of boxes. We are truly grateful. But, I would be totally lying if I were to say I am totally excited about this. I never thought in a million years I would move back home. I never in a million years thought I would give birth and start my family just to take her home back to my parents. I didn't think we'd be squishing our home in with my parents. It's hard. I don't love it. It's only been a week and although it's been fine, I miss having a place for just me and Caleb. I'm a bit nervous to bring a baby here. The help will be great, but we wish were doing this in our own place. I already miss our privacy, being able to walk around with no clothes or a bra (sounds silly but its the truth), not having to share a bathroom with someone other than Caleb, eating dinner just the two of us, and just having our own place. We are still for sure looking for homes and we have a want in mind, but because we are so close to having this baby, we know it will have to wait for a little while longer. Another move will soon be happening as we are wanting our own place, basically yesterday, but because house buying can go quickly or slowly, we aren't exactly sure how long we'll be here. Hopefully not too long, and we will be able to get into our own place soon. Until then, I am trying my very hardest to be content with the change, grateful that we at least had a place to go, enjoy my moments with Caleb as much as I can, and also enjoy the time spent with my family. On the plus side of it all, it's only a one minute drive to Caleb's work instead of 15. He super loves that. :) 

Throughout this week I was feeling a bit bitter about the whole situation. I wanted to know why god was putting us through this at the absolute worst timing possible. I wanted to be humbled and not feel so upset or bitter about the move. Even though I haven't loved it, there have already been a couple tender mercies that have shown me that this is what we are supposed to do at this time. It just so happened that at church today in relief society, the lesson was on tender mercies and I had plenty go through my mind. It was interesting going back to the ward both me and Caleb grew up in. There is a completely different feeling there than any other ward we have been too and it's for the better. I missed it and am grateful for the welcoming feeling we both get when we go. Maybe that alone is why we were supposed to come here. I don't know. All I know is that this is where we are supposed to be at this time. It's hard, and I still have bitter feelings, but I know it's right, and that we will be alright. We are only here temporarily so we both are trying our hardest to make the best of it as this time should be a very exciting time with bringing in our first baby. I honestly think I am having a harder time with it all than Caleb is. He's pretty easy to please. haha 

I want to thank everyone for their help with the move, for my families willingness to allow us back into their home to live for a while, my siblings that gave up their bedroom and part of their bathroom to make room for us, for my sister and her allowing me to cry and vent to her, Caleb's parents for watching Libbie so we could move and for whatever other reasons, and lastly, my husband. I don't know how he does it, but even when I am the most angry, sad, stressed, whatever it is, he still is fully capable of making me feel loved, keeps me laughing every single day, and is such a joy to be around. His positive outlook on everything in life makes me want to be a better person. I love him with all my heart and am grateful I have him by my side to do all this with. He's the bomb. I sure love that tutz. Here's to hoping that we can settle in here and that it goes well, and that we can have luck finding a home to buy. We are hopeful!

34 weeks and update!

34 weeks pregnant!? Oh my goodness we are getting down to the wire. Sorta. It's like it's so close, yet so far away!

The bump. Gettin reaaalll large.

As far as this last week and how things are going, i'd say overall I feel like crap, yet the pregnancy is going good. I had my doctors appointment today and even though I feel very pregnant and honestly pretty crummy, I couldn't help but walk out just feeling so so grateful! My blood pressure looks great, my weight gain is a pretty small amount which I'm very happy about, I have no swelling, my belly actually measured right on track this week rather than two weeks ahead, baby girls' heartbeat was a good 156 bpm, I found out I can continue my heartburn medication which makes me VERY happy, and overall, the pregnancy is just great. I'm healthy, she's healthy, and it like makes me proud and just happy knowing that my body has been able to give this baby a life and that things are just going really good. As far as how I'm feeling is kind of another story. haha. It's all definitely normal, but this week especially I feel like a lot of the first trimester symptoms are creepin back into my life which makes things hard sometimes. The nausea is back a lot. I'm seriously exhausted tired. As in, I've been sleeping in till at least 11 every day. The other day I slept in till 12:30. Horrible, I know. But I'm seriously just so so wiped. My appetite is fading and I find that the food aversions are coming back and that food just never sounds good anymore. I get STUFFED full feeling after I eat like quarter of a sandwich. Smells really bother me again. My sleep is just horrible. I have to literally grab my mattress to help roll me to my other side. I toss and turn all night, get up to use the bathroom multiple times, and just cannot sleep throughout the night. My hips have been throbbing at night especially. I have yet to find something that helps them besides a bath. I feel like my lungs are getting squished so it doesn't take much for me to feel out of breath. If I drop ANY food on the ground I just call for Libbie rather than attempt to pick it up. She's usually happy about that anyway. haha. I am overall very uncomfortable and just getting so anxious to meet this baby of ours. My doctor said today that if things are going good and if I am thinned out any and dilated at all that he will induce me at 39 weeks if she hasn't come before then. So, that's only 4.5 weeks away! It's hard to know what to plan for because obviously it could realistically be anywhere within 3 to almost 6 weeks till we meet her. Something I am VERY excited about is that tomorrow is the FOR SURE day we are moving ALL our crap into my parents storage unit thing so we can set up a baby room and get EVERYTHING put into place for when this baby comes. It's basically like we are moving, but not because we are staying in the same place. It's gonna probably take all weekend to do so, but, I'm just excited to get everything set up, organized, and ready for this baby! I feel like we are cutting it fairly close, but, ah, I just can't wait to get her clothes washed and ready, her crib set up, the changing table all ready, just everything. I'm excited. 

As for other things this from this last week.

The diy headbands that were at my baby shower that never got made I finally got around too. It was kinda fun to make them how I wanted and they took up a decent part of my day which was nice.

I had been feeling a bit blue the last few days just because I have been home alone allllll day by myself and not feelings great. So yesterday, I got up, got ready, and forced myself out of the house, I met up with my sister in Idaho Falls and ran a few errands with her. It felt so good to get out, and get some fresh air. 

No worries, I didn't actually drive with him on my lap. Just look at his squishyness! I love that boy!

My belly this last week has just been rollin and doing waves non stop. One day she was going crazy in there and I look down and my belly seriously had a bulge on the top right. It was completely lopsided. I could feel her right under my rib and kinda had to push her back down because lets be real, I don't think any mom likes to have her ribs feel like they're being separated. haha. I feel like I'm constantly asking her what in the world she is doing in there?! So amazing!

I also did 6 haircuts on my family on Saturday. Whew! Everyone was due for one. And that's pretty much been my week. 

Caleb has once again been working hard and LOTS of hours. It really depends on the week of how many hours he gets so some weeks it's normal and other weeks like this week he gets plenty of overtime and also works 6 days a week and still has to go out on Sunday for about an hour. I'm definitely proud of him. I'm a bit selfish and do get pretty lonely when I'm here alone allll day long. Waking up alone and going to sleep alone, eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner alone, it all get's kinda lonely. But, I'm grateful, and soon enough I'll have a wee little one to take care of during the day to keep my busy. I'm grateful he works so hard so I can stay home and will be able to stay home to be a momma. I am grateful for his positive attitude about his job and him seriously NEVER complaining about work or anything really. He keeps me laughing every day. He is definitely the best part about my life and every day. I love him oh so much!

Maternity pictures/ 33 weeks!

Tonight I had my sister Kristie take some maternity pictures of me and Caleb. Caleb was just oh, SO excited to have them done. ;) He's a trooper. The deal was he would do maternity pics with me if I gave him x amount of massages. A deal's a deal. And that's how we roll. haha! I would eventually SOME day love to get some professional pictures taken. We've never had them. Over the past years we've always just taken them on my phone. They work for now to get some nice pictures, but yes, I would like some professional ones someday. For phone pictures I feel like they turn out pretty decent.

I really liked this one.

And this one. Caleb is such a hunk!

And these two.

So yes, today I am 33 weeks pregnant. I am feeling VERY done. 7 weeks to go and I couldn't be more excited. My friend was induced today to have her baby which means out of family and friends, I'm NEXT to have a baby. YAY! Baby girl has officially found my ribs this last week. She lives under my right one all day and night which it totally comfortable. Not. Sleep is basically non existent anymore. It takes me like 2 hours every night to fall asleep, and then between having to get up to pee at least twice, braxton hicks contractions when I stir all throughout the night, my hips and/or back throbbing, me being hungry or thirsty, it's near impossible. Pregnancy insomnia is totally winning. Overall though the pregnancy is still going great and for that I am grateful. I just hope these next weeks fly by. Baby should be weighing over 4 lbs now, is over 17 inches long, and about the size of a pineapple. She's just chinking right up! I can't wait to have a squishy baby to hold soon! So excited :)

My baby shower

My baby shower was held on Sat. Oct. 10th at 6 that night at my parents house. Rewind to planning the shower. I never realized how much work it took to planning something. I feel we kept it fairly simple yet hours and hours and hours were put into planning, lots of money was spent by the time you get the food, decorations (even if they're cheap), and everything planned. I am grateful for my mom and sisters' help into planning this special day for me. Because my mom is working and I am not, I volunteered to buy pretty much everything to help her out. So I met up with my sister one of the days to buy some decorations. The other stuff I just bought at walmart while I was out and about. I ended up ordering a diy headband making kit off amazon. When I received it, I had to put hours of time into cutting around each flower because they were all sewn onto a tulle fabric, along with having to cut the elastic and gluing them together to make the actual headbands. I wrote and sent out all the invitations, and also made the party favors. My sister met me at my parents house the day before the shower to bake the cupcakes (because she had the tin for them) and also plan the games because we still had not figured out exactly what we would be doing. We spent all day mainly chatting and procrastinating on everything. We did get a couple things done though. On Sat. I woke up early and met up with my mom to do the shopping for the food and any last minute items we needed for that night. We then came back to my parents and spent ALL day prepping food, getting games ready, and doing the decorating. It was warm, but fairly breezy that day and I was expecting a decent amount of people to show up so we ended up setting everything up outside. We braced the wind and just went with it hoping the wind would die down that evening like it usually..ok sometimes.. does. 6 o'clock rolls around and guests started to show up. There wasn't quite as many people that showed up as I was expecting, so I suppose we could have done it inside and avoided the wind, but, what do you do, just go with flow. I'll just post the pictures now because they basically show the evening.

While getting everything ready for the night, my sister came in with a diaper cake that her, my mom and two sisters' had made for me. Definitely made me feel special and I was IN LOVE. It screams me with all the pink, glitter, and decorations. LOVED IT.

Just a few decorations on the front porch.

A bunch of my ultrasound pictures I have gotten over the months. Just a decoration piece. 

Kinda hard to see in the picture, but this was one of the games we played. There are 3 baby pictures of Caleb and 3 of me. The guests had to guess how old we were in each photo.

Party favor and gift table.

This was the diy headband station, something I was VERY excited about. I had never seen this done at a shower and thought it would be fun for guests to do while waiting for other people to show up or if people were mingling or whatever. After the night was over, only 1 headband was made. So, sounds like I will make the rest just how I want them to be ;) 

These were the cupcakes my sister made. They turned out SO delicious. We went with a pumpkin cupcake with cream cheese frosting. Perfect for a fall shower.

The guests. All family but one.

The party favors and game winner gifts. These were kind of a nightmare. Long story short, I had to run to the store 3 different times to get these baggies filled with candy because I kept running out. I didn't expect to have to buy so much candy to fill the bags! The guests got pretty much every candy you can think of because there is quite the variety in them. haha

The party favors, game winner prizes, and gift table.

The table cloths are actually pink, bad lighting I guess. This was for when the guests first arrived. I needed them to write their name and address on an envelope. The rocks were last second weights we gathered from the driveway because the wind kept blowing anything and everything off the tables.

I had "give the mommy to be advise" cards that was also on the table when they first came in.

The food table. Dinner was sandwiches, chips, fruit with dip, vegetable tray, cupcakes, water, and a  slushie drink aka sherbet and 7up. 

Doing the games. We played 3 games. The first was how old were we game? The board above with a few of mine and Caleb's baby pictures. 2nd game was unscramble the words game and they were timed. And the 3rd, was a baby scategories game. I didn't want to spend a lot of time on games so these few just took a small amount of time which I liked. 

My best friend Katie from when we were babies came to my shower. I had not seen her since hair school! It was so so good to see her and catch up. Miss that girl! Excuse the fact that I look like a whale.

Opening gifts.

Again, opening gifts. I received a bunch of home made blankets. So thoughtful of the people who took the time to make them! I am SET on blankets. I also received just a few nick knack items. A wipes container, a couple toys, a few books, thermometer, a couple sleepers, a book that can document all things adorable and stats and what not for baby girl, a thing of lotion and bum cream, a couple outfits, and crates for baby girls' room. I appreciate everyone that came and supported me and our baby and took the time out of their day to stop by. We kept the shower short and sweet and it lasted just over an hour. It was SO windy that I think everyone was done being outside. haha After everyone left, I told my sister that I think I had a million braxton kicks contractions just during the shower. I'm supposed to go in if I have more than 5 an hours but this has happened before and it's usually just from me overdoing it. She insisted I sit down. It had been a huge couple of days that were non stop going so I was sure my body was just telling me to sit and be done because I was way overdoing it. We got everything cleaned up from outside and was organizing and putting away everything in the house. I finally was able to go home and boy was I wiped by the time I got home. I didn't do anything but talk to Caleb and go to bed. The next day I don't think I have ever felt so sore in my life! My contractions definitely slowed way down, but my legs, hips and back were just so so sore. So, Sunday, I didn't do a thing. I sat, and I rested, I went and did the order at Calebs work with him, and then I sat and rested some more. Today, (Monday) I am feeling much better. Being that sore and realizing just how limited I am is just showing how close this baby is to being here! I feel bad when I just need to sit or am not much help because I am needing to sit, but it's true that there really isn't anything I can do about it. Just makes me feel bad watching instead of helping. Anyway. Now that the shower is over, I can REALLY see what all we need to get and can start getting everything ready for her arrival. I still feel like there's tons to get and stuff to do. So, one day at a time, and I have just been breaking it down and doing little by little as time goes by. I'm SO excited to meet this baby girl! I want it to be December already! 

32 Weeks

8 weeks left! Hopefully a little less :) Not too much less, but I'd be ok with her coming in 5 weeks. We'll see what happens!

There's that bump! I actually took this last week sometime but it's basically the same as now. So, it'll do. I am for sure feeling done with being pregnant. I want to feel myself again, I want my clothes to fit, I want to be able to do every day things that I feel I can't do anymore. I want my energy back, to be able to bend over, sleep on my stomach, and to be able to walk without feeling like I'm going to pee my pants. I don't mean to sound whiny or ungrateful, but, I'm pretty sure every pregnant person gets to this point at some time. The closer it gets, the more emotional I find myself. In a good way though. I think it's the fact that she's like actually a little baby in there and her moves and kicks are so much stronger that it makes it just very very real. My belly is large and I can watch it just roll with baby girls movements and kicks which is just awesome to watch and feel. I find myself crying happy tears often because while going through infertility, I got to such a low point where I seriously thought I would NEVER get to experience this. It being here, and having it now just weeks away makes me feel so blessed and just happy that I will be able to experience motherhood-the thing I've wanted my entire life. I can't wrap my head around it sometimes. Something interesting that I want to note, I don't know if it's just me, or if all people that have dealt with infertility feel this, but, I often have a cloud of guilt hovering over me. I secretly love all the stares I get when people's eyes go to my belly, yet, I often wonder if any of those eyes that stare are eyes of people that are going through what I had gone through. I always wonder what people are thinking. Is she dying inside because she wants so bad what I currently have? Are people thinking, oh look, another prego, (it is rexburg, a highly family populated city), are people excited or happy? I just remember back when dealing with infertility that any time I saw a pregnant woman, I could not help but get super jealous or sad because I SO badly wanted to be in their shoes. I will never know what lives these people live or what trials or hardships they have or are facing, all I know, Is that, I wish so badly that I could take the pain of hurt, sadness, and hopelessness away from any person that struggles with infertility. I sometimes wonder what made me so lucky to experience this and why this couple that's been struggling longer than we ever did still isn't. God's plan is interesting. I for sure have had my eyes opened because of going through this trial and wonder if not having gone through it, if I would be as aware to others as I am today. Anyway, I know that's kind of all over the place, but I wanted to jot down my thoughts. 

I did have a doctors appointment last week along with another ultrasound. Everything is looking perfect. My belly itself still measured a couple weeks ahead, but the ultrasound looks right on track with everything, so they aren't worried at all. The ultrasound showed that baby girl has some hair! I was dying! The tech said it looked long already too. haha I'm super curious what she will look like! Even if she came out a baldy, I will still be thrilled. But, if she came out with a full head of it, I will probably just die over it! It's the hairdresser in me ;) She also is measuring in the 50th percentile for everything. So seriously, just perfect. I know ultrasounds have been wrong with babies weight, but I also know that they are right a lot of the time too, so with that being said, she was 1 oz shy of 4 lbs! And this was last Thursday. So if that's the case I'm sure she is a little over 4 lbs now. Crazy! I know of a few babies born at 4 lbs if not smaller. I'm SO grateful and just feel so blessed. She has the hiccups a lot, which, to be honest, are slightly obnoxious in my opinion. Caleb was able to feel them the other morning which I loved, but, poor thing! I hate hiccups and I feel like she either gets them like 3 times a day or none at all. 

My baby shower is Saturday and I think we have most of it planned. It's mainly last minute things we have to do. I'm hoping it flows well and that what we have planned will be fun for our guests. I'm not a huge party person so I mainly want to keep it short and sweet. 

As for news besides baby news, nothing. Haha. Pretty much same old same old. 

31 Weeks!

31 weeks pregnant! Woo hoo!

I'm feeling so thrilled to be to this point. Not that much longer! Really, nothing much has changed from last week. I'm still feeling large, uncomfortable, sick, and all things pregnant, yet, I am getting more and more excited to meet this baby. I think the best way to describe all of it is that I'm a happy turtle. haha Happy, yet slow at everything. I have been having so many braxton hicks contractions and those definitely slow me down. Also! A little update on my pregnancy rash. It's basically gone! I am SO relived it went away with that prescription and that I didn't have to wait till birth for it to leave. I think having it for about 2 months is plently long enough. It was miserable. I do have scars on my leg and foot from scratching so hopefully those purple scars will fade over time. I'm sure they will. As ugly as they are, I'm just glad that the rash is gone and that I can sleep, and function again. I wouldn't wish that rash on my worst enemy. So, overall, the pregnancy is going good. I have another doctors appointment tomorrow along with another ultrasound. Hopefully all goes well with those. 

This last week I went with my sister to get some baby shower supplies and while we were out and about, we went to Sam's Club. They had this offer going on for pregnant women or mom's with a child under 1. So, both me and my sister snagged a free 1 year membership. Pregnancy pays off with stuff like this. haha I had never owned a Sam's card before mainly because I probably wouldn't use it enough to make the 45 dollars a year even worth it. But, now that I got it for free, It will come in handy at times. I also met up with my sister and a couple of our friends for lunch in the park for the first time in years. I typically am NOT one that enjoys to meet up with people. It gives me major anxiety and I'd much rather just stay at home. But, it ended up being a lot of fun. We talked all things pregnancy/birth/baby since 2 of us are prego, another just had her baby about a month ago, then my sister has her baby. It was nice to talk about all the scary stuff, or funny/embarrassing things of pregnancy. Eased my mind some and was nice to talk about it all. 

This is the first week in months that Caleb's schedule has gone pretty much back to normal and it's been so so great! Instead of him working 6 days a week with 1 to 2 double shifts in there plus sometimes going out on Sunday, he is now working just 5 days a week. Normal hours, normal shifts, and still may have to go out on Sundays, but depends on the week. It's been great having him home at night. I appreciate all the hard work he puts in for us. He's awesome!

I came down with a cold or something. So that on top of being pregnant is kind of brutal. I feel quite awful, but I'm hoping that drinking my weight in water will have this cold be sent on it's way sooner than later. 

It's like she knows I haven't felt well and she'll come and snuggle. I love it! I also was able to get all my baby shower invitations out, party favors made, and most of the decorations bought this last week. There's a couple more things I'm going to do to get ready for it including a couple crafts, but it's coming along. I'm both nervous and excited for this shower. 

We never got around to moving our furniture to make room for baby girl last week, but for sure we need to do it this weekend because next week is my baby shower and I'm hoping to be able to come home and have a place for the things we receive.

30 weeks and de junking

I am 30 weeks pregnant today! It feels like another milestone hit. I am happy we have made it this far and realistically, this baby could come in 7 to 10 ish weeks! Eeek!

A little recap on the last week. So, I would say as far as how i'm feeling, this last week has for sure been one of the harder weeks of being pregnant. I don't know how to describe it other than I feel very pregnant! Large, uncomfortable, achy, and kind of miserable at times. I feel my best if I literally do NOTHING all day and can just sit. Even doing my few household chores for the day seriously makes me feel completely done for the day. It's been a little frustrating because I just feel like a crippled old lady and have to really balance out my errands, chores that need done, meals made, stuff like that for the week. A little every day and that's about all I can do. I constantly have a heat pad or our massage thing on my back, and my feet propped up. I have had SO many braxton hicks contractions. They are definitely uncomfortable and get worse or happen more often If I haven't eaten in a while, or haven't drank as much water as I should be drinking. I'm so sleepy all hours of the day. I have dealt with horrible heartburn most of my pregnancy but this last week it's been horrendous to where I WISH I would just throw up already. It's been just awful! I have tried anything and everything so I'm thinking at my next appointment I'll have him give me a prescription for it because it's been just horrible. My belly has just been rolling and moving like crazy lately. It's so fun to watch! She for sure is getting bigger and being able to feel her and now see her move all the time has for sure been a favorite while being pregnant. I forgot to mention a a few weeks ago that I was out at my parent's one night and my mom, and two sisters were all gathered close with their hands on my belly and all 3 of them felt baby kicks. It was a special moment that I won't forget. :)

Seriously! Watch her come out as a baldy. haha

After tons of ups and downs for months and months, as of right now, it's looking like we will have to stay here in this apartment for when this baby gets here. That could change any time, but as of now, that's the plan. I'm not gonna lie, i'm very bummed. It's not at all what we had planned. This place is small. It's SO squishy as is with just me and Caleb here. So, making room for even the essentials is going to probably make it so we don't get to set up a Christmas tree this year :(, all of her things will be in the living room/kitchen, and a TON of our stuff including seasonal clothes will have to go into storage to make this work. I know there could be worse things but we were really hoping to be out and in a place of our own before she came and I was SO looking forward to snuggling a baby around the Christmas tree this year. Since there really isn't much we can do about it, we'll make the best out of what we have and just make it work. It will be hectic, it will be very unorganized, it will probably continue to stress me and my ocd organized self out till we move, but, it's at least a place to live for now. So this last week we started the whole de clutter/ cleaning/ moving things around to make this work. Caleb had Saturday off so that day we went through our bedroom. We both had to get rid of TONS of clothes and shoes so that it would all fit in our little closet. That took up hours that day and that's all we did that day. On Sunday, we ended up cleaning out our spare bedroom. This room is a mess. It's basically our storage room that holds ALL our stuff plus all of Caleb's grandma's furniture since this apartment was furnished when we moved in. It took up many hours that day. We got rid of SO much stuff that had been just collected over the past 5+ years, threw tons of stuff away, and deep cleaned what we could until we get the stuff moved to a storage unit. Although it felt VERY refreshing to de junk, throw away, and clean up the place, I could totally tell that I WAY over did it. I had a friends baby shower that I was supposed to attend that night and I seriously didn't know if I was going to make it. I have been having plenty of braxton hicks contractions lately but on Sunday, I was seriously having them back to back which was making me nervous. My feet felt raw, my stomach just hurt and was tight tight tight all day long, and my back and hips were done. I had NO time to sit or lie down because I had to get ready for the baby shower that night. I felt awful all day and that was seriously the first day that my pregnant self reeeallyy told me I over did it. I ended up going to the baby shower which ended up being a lot of fun, and it was nice that I could finally sit for a couple hours for the day. It got me excited for my shower coming up and also just brings more reality of the fact that we will be having a baby! I started feeling better that night but I zonked when I got home. I am not really sure how I will be much help when we are moving stuff around because my body just tells me enough is enough and I just can't do it. I don't want to risk anything by overdoing it either so thank goodness for a husband that has already told me time and time again that he will do all of it. 

Don't judge, but, that's my living room. All those bags, tv, shelf, stereo, pretty much everything but the baby stuff, treadmill, and couches (that aren't even ours) we took to the di. It's pretty much what my house feels like lately. Stuff is just squished and there's just no where to put things. It's been overwhelming but that's what we have been up too! Now that we have de junked our place, we are hoping that this weekend we can get things moved around/ taken to a storage unit so that we can start setting up some stuff for this baby. I'm hoping I can organize and squish things around enough to leave a place we can set up our Christmas tree for this year. That's really all I want. Even if it's in our bedroom in the middle of the floor. I want that to go up. So, that's my goal. We shall see if all my teen years of playing tetris will pay off ;) 

Another thing from this last week was that me and my sister did each other's hair. Long story short, mine ended up not blended and the color was just off and I didn't have the right color at home to tone it and make it work. So I had to re plan and go with a different route so it would look better. I ended up fixing my hair over the course of a couple days. It's a bit better now but I'm to the point of just letting my ugly natural hair grow out so I don't have to deal with it anymore. That's I suppose why I don't just let it grow. I'm not a fan of my natural and I for sure like my highlights in there. I have a hard time going to pay to get it done where I'm a hairstylist myself and know what to do yet I just can't see the back of my head and can't angle everything so I'm just in the process of making it work for now.

My nephew's birthday is tomorrow but we ended up celebrating it last Saturday at my parent's house. We had a weenie roast and just kept it simple. It ended up being a fun night! I can't believe it's been a year since he was born! Seems like it was just yesterday!

Caleb has worked a bunch extra this week so he is never home. It's getting depressing! I miss him every second he is gone. I could never be a truck drivers wife, or have my husband be in the army because I emotionally could not handle it! I don't know how people do it. Libbie has been my little buddy while he's at work. Thank goodness for her. 

Overall life is still good! A bit stressful at the moment or more so just a lot of emotions and things going on, but, we're just taking it one day at a time and still just trying to stay positive about this whole apartment thing. I am LOVING the fall weather coming. I am a sucker for fall. On the cooler days I have been breaking out my long sleeved shirts and jackets and just LOVE it!