Sunday, May 5, 2019

Kira's pregnancy and birth story

A little back story and something personal. For about a whole year, Kinley cried to me and asked daily for a baby sister. Seriously every day. I was not baby hungry in the slightest. Kinley and her epilepsy as a baby gave me some serious anxiety and ptsd. The thought of babies now terrified me even though I was obsessed with them prior. But, she at only 2 would actually cry to me asking for a baby sister. When this started happening and kept going on for a while,  I strongly felt that Kinley knew more than I did and I felt there was another little spirit wanting to be earth side. I had some special moments that confirmed that this was what we were supposed to do even though I really was not ready. After praying about it for months and having so much anxiety about adding to our family, we decided to start trying. We weren't sure how long it would take especially because it took so long with fertility treatments to get Kinley here. It was July of 2018, 2 months in of trying, and I thought I was trying to start my period. It was different than normal but wouldn't stop so I figured it was my period. After a week I wondered if maybe it was implantation spotting, even though it was heavier than just spotting. I had one last cheapy pregnancy test sitting in our closet. So one morning I figured I'd take it, just to rule out pregnancy. I was certain it would be negative. While washing my hands and looking at the test, it was clearly negative. I thought, yeah, just a weird period I guess. After I dried my hands and went to throw the test away, I saw the faintest of faint 2nd line and my heart dropped to my stomach. I stared at that thing forever with all the emotions. Mostly shock though. I was getting ready to head to my sisters house. Before I went there, I went to Wal mart and bought like 3 more different tests. I got to my sister's house and showed her the tests that I wanted to take. We both were freaking out. I took the nice tests and sure enough, all of them were positive. I ugly cried at my sister's house. It was surreal! I was so nervous to be pregnant again, to add another baby to our family, scared of it all really, yet I had a very peaceful feeling about it and knew everything would be a ok.
The cheapy test I took at my house.


Definitely pregnant! 

So this pregnancy was hands down, one of the hardest things I've gone through. I was really sick with Kinley too, but this pregnancy was so much worse. I was basically on the couch all day every day, and would try to sleep away my misery every chance I could. I was throwing up multiple times every single day for months. I had absolutely ZERO energy and was completely exhausted. Like, I felt like my arms weighed 100 lbs each and it took every amount of effort in me to move. I'd get super car sick. Medicine didn't help me at all and would cause other problems. I had absolutely horrible food aversions that sometimes even the thought of a certain food would make me throw up. I had to gag anything down for every meal and every snack. I started having braxton hicks contractions at around 11 weeks and they continued throughout my entire pregnancy. I'd basically ugly cry to Caleb multiple times a week because it was exhausting and so hard to feel that awful and not escape it. Still trying to be a mom to Kinley and being that sick was brutal. I relied heavily on prayer, my husband, and occasionally a priesthood blessing when it seemed like I couldn't go on. Things started to look up about half way into my pregnancy. This pregnancy was for sure harder on my body and was so much more uncomfortable than my first. I would have my doctor adjust me every appointment. I had sciatic nerve issues all throughout which made it so I could barely walk at times. Other than that, I had all the typical aches and pains that come with pregnancy, all which are not pleasant. By 30 weeks, I was miserable. It seemed like everything went downhill from there and by 36 weeks, I couldn't wait to get this baby out of me. I had scheduled an induction for 39w 4d if I hadn't had her yet. I was really hoping to go on my own because I didn't particularly want to be induced, but, I was so uncomfortable that I would do anything at that point to have her. Starting at 37 weeks, I started having false labor. Each time it would happen in the night but every time, the contractions would die off after a couple hours and were never that painful. 



I was 38w 6d and was beyond uncomfortable. That day I was running errands with Caleb and felt like I could hardly walk. I was having so many braxton hicks contractions, my hips and back were so sore, I was kind of grumpy and I just wanted to go home and lay down. That night, I cried myself to sleep because I was just so so done. I don't remember being this uncomfortable with Kinley's pregnancy.  This pregnancy was definitely harder on my body. I went into labor with Kinley at 39 weeks exactly so I was hoping that I would with this pregnancy too. I finally fell asleep around 11 that night. I woke up to Kinley at midnight, so now officially 39 weeks and have had 1 hour of sleep. While putting her back to sleep, I was having contractions and they hurt. After Kinley fell back asleep, I then started timing my contractions and told Caleb who hadn't gone to sleep yet what was going on. The contractions were getting intense fast and I wasn't really able to talk through them. I figured that this was probably it so I finished packing our hospital bags, took a shower to see if that would slow them down at all, which they didn't, and continued to time them. They were about 2 min apart lasting about 1 min. I had Caleb take Libbie our dog to his parents house and at about 2 am I called my mom to come stay with Kinley. Besides the painful contractions, things were good. We were laughing and excited and nervous. Before we left, I snuck into Kinley's room and snuggled and smooched her over and over. It was such a bittersweet moment for me knowing that would be the last time I'd see her with it being just the 3 of us, yet so excited for her to meet her sister. 
My last bump picture I took at 38 weeks

The drive to the hospital was intense. My contractions were awful. I definitely couldn't talk though them and they were killer. Id hang onto the handle above the window, arch my back, teeth clenched, eyes shut type of contractions were happening. Between them though, me and Caleb would just talk and laugh till another came and then things would be serious. Me and Caleb got to the hospital around 3:30 am. We had to enter through the E.R. since it was in the middle of the night and the front doors were closed. I got my first ever wheelchair ride to the labor and delivery wing. Once we got to our room, my contractions were about to put me in tears. I was definitely not able to talk through them and they were intense. I got changed and into the bed. By this time it was 3:45 am. The nurse checked me and I was 5 cm dilated. Woo! That was exciting to me. I was officially in active labor and we were going to have a baby soon. By this point my contractions were back to back. I had maybe 20 seconds in between them and they were so awful. Pretty sure Caleb's hand was sore from me squeezing it so tight. The tears started coming too. My nurse called the anesthesiologist right away because I was more than ready for that epidural. While waiting, my nurse got my IV in and blood work. Not too long after, the anesthesiologist came in to give me my epidural. I was so grateful to see him. He was whizzing through all the paperwork and risks and yada yada because It was clear I was miserable and we were ready to get that epidural Haha. I got my epidural around 4:30 am. And as weird and not enjoyable as it was to get that, I felt sooo much better. The popping and crunching feeling while getting it freaks me out. I did have a moment right after I got it where I got super light headed and incredibly nauseous and kinda blacked out there for a bit. After about 10 minutes of that first initial dose, things got better and I felt sooo much better. My body could finally relax and the nausea was subsiding. The nurse then put my catheter in then left us to labor and rest for a bit. I think at around 5:30 am, she checked me again and couldn't tell how far dilated I was because my bag of water was bulging and in the way. She could tell I had a little bit to go though. At 6 am, I called my sister Kristie. She was going to be there for the delivery and take pictures. I told her that I'd call her back when I got checked again so she didn't come and just wait around for hours since labor can last a long time. At around 7, I could start to feel my contractions again. They weren't necessarily painful but I could feel them. At 7:30 am, Dr. Leavitt came in to break my water. When he checked me, baby was right there. My water was bulging and I was fully dilated and ready to push. No wonder I could feel my contractions again. She was low and coming. I frantically call my sister who lives about 35-40 min away and tell her to hurry as fast as she could. My doctor said we could wait till she got there to break my water and start pushing. She arrived right at 8 am. Thank goodness she didn't miss it! Dr. Leavitt came back in by 8:15 am. He broke my water and I started to push. As I was pushing, we realized that there was meconium in my water. They called a NICU team in just in case. While pushing, the mood was light, exciting, and just fun honestly. Dr. Leavitt was showing my sister everything down there since she was so fascinated. Caleb stayed by my side since he gets grossed out about that stuff haha. In between contractions we all would just talk and joke around. Dr. Leavitt was trying to get Kristie to date his son haha things were fun! Things were happening fairly quickly. Her head was right there but kinda stuck so my Dr did an episiotomy which I was a little bummed about, but, whatever to get the baby here safe and sound. I pushed for I think 6 contractions as hard as I could. The nurses and my doctor were great and coaching me through it. That last push, I looked down and I watched myself push out our baby girl which was really amazing! I wasn't in near the pain as I was with Kinley so I got to actually open my eyes and see myself and what my body was capable of doing. It was amazing! Once I had her, Caleb cut the cord, and she was put on my chest. The moment you have a baby is absolutely surreal. It's an incredible and spiritual experience for me. I couldn't believe that this little baby, the one we've all talked about and waited for for almost a year now, was finally here. They wiped her down some and then took her over to make sure she was ok from the meconium. She ended up being perfectly fine and healthy. She wasn't much of a cryer and that had me a little nervous, but she checked out fine! They weighed her, did all the vitals, and continued to clean her off. She was hardly making a peep so I kept asking if she was ok, which she was, just calm! While they were doing all of that, my Dr was stitching me up. They brought baby girl back to me and I did skin to skin. The moment I did that, it was a little emotional and just so special. My baby girl was finally here! She was healthy, beautiful, and so loved already. And, I was no longer pregnant! Haha 



















Kira Layne Niederer 
Born March 23rd, 2019
8:35 a.m.
6 lbs.
19 inches