thank goodness for moms

thank goodness for moms, awesome husbands, and understanding instructors.

this year has by far been the hardest ive ever delt with. long story short, you know how ive been sick lately, for like the past 2 + months? ive been to community care and nothin....so i finally went to the doctor yesterday and finally got some help. turns out that they think that stress/anxiety/depression is making me litterally sick. to solve this, they gave me pills right? i took my first one last night and it was pure hell from there. i was up till 3 with the worst nausea ever. light headed, racing heartbeat, and was having a huge meltdown on my husbands shoulder. of coarse complaining how i cant take any more of not feeling well every single day of my life along with alll the other stresses in life. he held me till i fell asleep. i woke up this morning and tried to get ready for school. i got in the shower and nearly passed out because im so light headed. i figured its probly not smart to go to school. deep down im more frustrated than ever. ive already missed more school than i should have but i physically cant make myself go. So i went back to bed. Caleb woke up a little later and went off to work. i texted my mom to call me when she had a second from school. and when she called later i simply fell apart. i bawled like a baby...you know..the kind that makes you basically wanna puke? and i just told her i didnt know what to about school and how ive missed so much and weather or not i should just take a medical leave so that i can get myself put back together and the side effects from these pills can subside. on the phone she told me that she was in Rigby but felt she should be here with me for a minute and that she was on her way to come see me. She shows up with some 7up for the nausea and just hugged me while i cried some more. and i tell you, that was simply what i have been needing. i dont think i will ever be too old to need my mom sometimes. she makes me feel so much better and reassures me that everything will be ok and work out how its supposed to.

later on i called my instructor and told him what was somewhat going on and what my options were with missing school and such. lets just say that he is a nice man and is going to help me through it.

Now, if i can just make it through the rest of this year, and make it through school, and that this stress will go away. i will make for a happier person.