My Kinler babe

Kinley had to get another blood draw for her epilepsy the other day and it was again not the best experience. I think we will be trying a different lab and hoping for a better experience...as good as it can get anyways. The one lady we keep getting who I believe is kind of head of the lab has just not done good. She can NEVER get the vein and it ends up being someone else to come try. She's kind of rude and is the old hag I've talked about previously. If we could get it done at Primary's each time, that would be great because they have always done the best. Anyway, we are waiting for results with that. I feel bad complaining about Kinley and all she has to go through because of her epilepsy because I know there are babies and children out there that have it much, much worse. But, I don't feel like this has been an easy road for us either and although it has gotten TONS better, everything from the seizures themselves, fighting her to take her medicine daily, constant dosage changes, the many blood draws, traveling, doctors appointments, phone calls back and forth from primary's, anxiety and everything, it is still something we battle and is always something we will have buzzing in the back of our minds. I feel like I have always been a sympathetic person, but this trial has opened my eyes even more of how you seriously just don't take life for granted. My heart aches for people with health problems, especially babies and children, along with the parents of those children. It is a very time consuming, constant issue, and very hard on parents to watch and not be able to take it away from their babies. Kinley has taught me just small things with this trial as well. It has brought me and Caleb closer together and has had us rely on the Lord more than I ever have for anything else in my life.

Pokes in each arm with lots of prodding in each. Fed her her favorite dinner and she was fine once we got home.

Kinley has been SO much fun lately. She is just about 15 months and is starting to jabber and tries to say words. It's the cutest thing. She ADORES Caleb and he can make her laugh more than anyone. Melts this mama's heart into a giant puddle each time. I have some funny videos of her but not sure how to upload them to here. This last week was the first week of her being alive that she has slept well! I almost don't want to talk about it because I'm afraid I will jinx it. haha! We are up early at 5:30 or 6 am with maybe only 1 time of getting up in the night. But, it has been wonderful and I can't believe how much better I feel with some sleep in my body! I am really hoping it continues. She still only takes her one nap a day for 30 min. She is obsessed with both Elmo and Caillou and will park her cute little bum inches from the tv and be glued. I'm sure some mom's will think that's a waste of time, but it's the only way I can get something done or have a little quiet time. She gave me and Caleb a scare last night and legitimately had choked on her dinner. After giving her a second to see if she could work it out herself and quickly realizing how serious it was, I quickly pulled her out of her high chair. We were pounding on her back trying to get it to come up and it wasn't. She kept trying to throw up but couldn't. She turned blue and I was seriously panicking at this point. I stuck my entire finger down her throat to get that food out. Still couldn't get it and It must have finally gone down because it never came up. I've never wanted someone to puke so bad before. It was awful and actually very very scary. It probably lasted a good 2 to 3 min. Way too long. I was glad Caleb was there by me. She barely had her first top tooth pop through a few weeks ago and then like a day ago her 2nd top tooth barely popped through. So she really only has her 2 bottom teeth that are actually big enough to chew. So it will be nice when she gets more teeth and can chew her food better. Life is so fun with her. I love having it be just me, her, and Caleb. Anyways. Here are a few pictures.

This Sunday, she just layed on me forever. We all just watched shows, cuddled, and napped. It was great!

One of the days it was actually nice here, I took her outside to play for the first time this year and she LOVED it. I have a feeling this summer we will be spending a ton of time playing outside.

Official weight loss post

Well, I did it! I have officially hit my goal of losing about 75 pounds! I never thought I would get to this point but I now have and I couldn't be more excited. It's crazy looking back now and realizing just how bad my eating habits used to be. I am no health nut now by any means, but I do eat way less, and less crap for sure. I try to work out almost every day. Some weeks are better than others but I do try to get some sort of physical activity in. I have cut out eating out almost completely which at the beginning was VERY, very hard for me. I used to eat fast food almost daily before. Not good, I know. I don't drink neeeaaar the soda, candy, sugar, or junk food that I used too, I have limited my pasta and breads, eaten smaller portions, upped my water intake, and overall just tried to eat better. It is crazy the difference. I remember things that just made me feel frustrated or insecure. Little things like sitting on the floor was something I really almost couldn't do. I NEVER was able to find clothes when I'd go shopping...seriously it was so so depressing. Being almost double the size of my husband was something that to me was very hard. I know he's just a little guy, but every picture I had I was literally almost double the size of him and I didn't want to be one of those couples. I was constantly cropping out our bodies and only doing head shots and even then I was just frustrated with each picture. Basically feeling like I needed suspenders or something to keep my pants up. I had a gut that would push down my pants and I was CONSTANTLY pulling up my pants or just holding them up by holding onto my belt loops the entire time I would walk. I remember sitting on a hard chair at church and seriously thinking, "my gosh these are incredibly uncomfortable". Well, now, I just realized it was because I couldn't fit well on the chair. I used to no longer be able to cross my legs when I sat down. Having to wear every pair of jeans unbuttoned constantly or even unzipped if I was sitting. Huffing and puffing while trying to tie my shoes or bend over for anything. Going snowboarding and seriously almost not being able to get my boot strapped into the binding because my gut was in the way. I would always have to flip to my toes to get up because I was too big to pull myself up. Going to the doctor being told I most likely had diabetes and that I needed to loose weight. Those are just some of the main things I remember that were big challenges for me at the time and I did NOT want to live my life like that any longer. I wanted to be healthy, happy, and be able to be comfortable and move and live a healthy life. Since losing the weight, I can do everything opposite of what I just wrote and it feels amazing. I can run and jump, sit on the floor (actually, I prefer it), take a picture with my husband and feel ok about it, put on a pair of jeans and button them up, find clothes when I go shopping, cross my legs, sit on a hard chair, tie my shoes, just THINGS that make me feel alive! I KNOW I am healthier and to me, that is the most important. I want to be able to raise my family in a healthy house and have my children know how important it is to take care of your body. Anyway, here is a before and after picture to show the difference!

Left--203 lbs.               Right--128-130 lbs.

More sickness, Valentines day, and random updates

So basically all of January was awful to say the least. It was one sickness on top of the other. Just after both me and Kinley got over the stomach flu, Caleb got a cold for the week. Then I came down with I think was a sinus infection and it knocked me to my butt. I felt like crap. Before I could get over what I had, Kinley then got sick. She wasn't perking up and on the 6th day she got really bad really fast. I ended up taking her to the doctor and kick myself in the pants wishing I had done so earlier, but we found out there that she indeed had RSV. She was miserable. Lethargic. She had thrown up 2 to 4 time a day and night from coughing so hard and I had done ALL I could do. Coughs are the WORST. No sleep (that's nothing new, but we're talkin NO sleep) due to the coughing. I would hold her in my recliner on my chest so that she was propped up and if she fell asleep I usually ended up just trying to somewhat rest in the recliner until she had another cough fit. The worst of it was about 2 weeks and although she's basically over it, she still will randomly have cough fits and you can still hear the junk in her lungs. She puked the other night from coughing so hard. The doctor did say that it'll linger for weeks. So, it's been just very wearing. 

Miserable. She fell asleep on me at the doctors which is SOO not her. 

If she was asleep basically sitting up and somewhat on top of me, I wouldn't move. She needed sleep so bad and if this was the best way she could without coughing for 5 min, then that's what would end up happening. 

As awful as it is with having a sick kido, the snuggles are wonderful!

Valentines this year was basically another day. We really aren't big on the holiday and usually keep it very simple. I made Caleb a heart shaped rice krispie treat (so easy, and one of his favorites) and one of his favorite dinners--lasagna. We were gonna go out to dinner the next day but then just wasn't feeling it. haha. We are kinda lame, we know. But we both just don't really care. He's my valentine every day and I love his stinkin guts. I prefer to celebrate love day, everyday.

My sister Kristie went to the Valentines dance and I got to do her hair. She loved it, and I thought it turned out very pretty. 

And now for pictures. They're random and not in order, but it's what we're up too. Again, mostly all of Kinley because she's my life!

 Kinley loves her new cousin Audrey

Kinley and her cousins playing in grandma's cupboard. I have pictures of me when I was a little girl playing in the same cupboard.

If she hears the dryer door open, she swoops in and climbs in every time haha

I find her here ALL the time.

Just watching dad shovel snow.

Dad and his girls

I'll find her feeding her baby every now and again.

I don't think I mentioned it, but my sister and her family has moved back from Logan and I am SO excited. Last year was very hard having her be gone. 

ALWAYS pulls out my shoes and plays with them but for some reason, these boots are her favorite.

Kinley loves playing with my phone and I found a selfie of her the other day and had a good laugh. 

More cousin loves

Just bein cute

I made a new wreath for our front door and also pulled out my vinyl cutter and made the c, s, and &, then painted the wooden frames and hung them above our bed. 

As for other news, Caleb and his job is just doing amazing. We have seen such great things happen since he's become an owner and we feel very blessed because of it. He stays busy with work, but doesn't have to work 60 hours a week so we can make it by and it's been wonderful.

I am doing pretty good. I'll admit that I've got the seasonal blues if you will. Between the weather, not being able to get outside, and all the sickness I've dealt with, I am MORE than ready for spring and some sunshine. I did book myself an appointment to get my eyebrows tattoo'd on and I am excited/nervous, but can't wait to make my awful brows amazing haha

Kinley, besides being sick, and trying to cut teeth, she's doing good. She has to get more bloodwork done next week which we all are dreading but know it has to be done. She's growing like a weed and is somewhat starting to say words. She can so far say Elmo (ahmo) and Juice (juju). She is OBSESSED with Elmo and Caillou. She still doesn't sleep good for me and usually after hours of fighting it every night, she typically ends up in our bed so I can get some sleep. She's still usually up every hour to 3 depending on the night. There was 2 nights in a row she slept till 6 am. I woke up in a panic and thought she had died because it was so odd. haha but man, those 2 nights were what I needed to help me not lose my mind haha. 

Libbie is good too. She only likes Kinley if Kinley gives her food, otherwise, she really isn't a fan. haha. She stays by Caleb most the time. 

We go to Boise for Caleb's work in 1.5 weeks so I'm praying we all stay well and healthy for that.