Our week

We'll start with side affects to Kinley's shots. It's been a rough week. I feel like she is pretty much back to herself, but I could definitely tell she didn't feel good especially those first few days. She had a fever on Monday night till about Wednesday. She would cry during feedings which she never does, and she did not sleep at night. We were up A. LOT. Wednesday early morning she had woken up, so I changed and nursed her. She was kinda fussy and didn't fall back asleep like she typically does. As I was burping her she spit up big time all over me. So half zombie I lay her down on my bed to go change my shirt. While changing, she spits up big time all over my bed. Feeling bad for her and not caring about my bed, I clean that up and she still acts hungry so I feed her again hoping she will fall asleep. She does and I lay her down. A couple minutes later I hear her like dry heaving so like a ninja I go to catch the spit up. I caught it just in time. She's been doing the dry heaving thing ALL week every night since her shots. I don't know if it's from them or not but I can't go back to sleep till she does it after she eats so I know she doesn't choke. It's kinda scary. Anyway, after the spit up incident, I assume she's good since she's still sleeping so I roll over to go to sleep. About a minute later I hear her dry heaving again, so again, like a ninja and lightning fast, I go to catch it. Poor thing projectile vomited. Everywhere. I caught some but she was covered, her rock n play had a puddle of puke that she was laying in, her swaddle wrap soaked, everything. I felt so bad! In the bath we go. I was so tired cause I had been up plenty throughout the night as it was but poor thing! After her bath I decided to just rock her cause clearly she didn't feel good. I slept (sorta not really) on our recliner holding her. She didn't do it again except for the dry heaving that turns into spitting up big time only in the night after she eats. I asked this mommy page I am apart of on facebook if they had any idea as to why she puked. Some mom's told me that their babies did the exact thing after getting the rotovirus vaccine and that it is a side affect. so I'm assuming that's what it's from. Also some moms said their babies became super spitty after that vaccine as well so maybe that's why she is so much spittier? Not really sure. 

Baby not feeling well=lots of cuddles.

Last week I FINALLY got my own hair done. I went more blonde and am much happier with it now.

Babywearing for the win! Seriously the ONLY way I am able to get things done.

So Kinley is theee hardest baby to get to sleep! It takes me hours to do it. Seriously. I have a strict routine I follow every night and every night without fail, I will lay her down after I've nursed her to sleep and she instantly wakes up and is all bright eyed and bushy tailed and full of smiles. It's hard to be so exhausted and frustrated when she is so smiley like this. She's a night owl for sure. I start getting her ready for bed at 8:30 PRAYING she'll be asleep by at least 10. It's usually anywhere between 11 and 1 am  after MANY attempts at putting her down that she finally crashes. Mom's always say that night time is when they finally get a little time to themselves and I have yet to experience this because it is an all night thing trying to get her to sleep. I've tried everything. 

More babywearing while cleaning

We woke up to a bunch of snow the other morning. Although I HATE the snow it sure is pretty and I don't mind it if I'm inside all day. But the moment I have to go outside I instantly hate it again. 

My Saturday was a hectic day. I had SO much to do and this MAJOR blowout was not part of the plan. I even got poop on my shirt for the first time. 2 baths in one day is fine right?

Sunday I wasn't feeling too great so we all stayed home and took it easy. I snuggled my baby and loved every second of it. I love being a mom!

As for other news. Caleb has been working his bum off trying to save up extra money for all this stuff we'll need for a house. (Washer, dryer, couch, paint, and all the little things) He got to go snowboarding with a bunch of his work crew and had a good time. My family left for out of town so this is the first weekend since moving here that we've had a place to ourselves. It's been quite nice! I do miss the company when he works nights though. I'm just home being a mom and staying plenty busy doing so. Things are busy but good!

2 months!

My baby is 2 months old! What the what!?! Crazy how fast time goes.

Kinley had her 2 month checkup and is still super healthy! She does have exzema all over her face and ears so we are in the process of clearing that up. Otherwise she is doing just awesome!

At 2 months Kinley,

*is 10 lbs 10 oz.

*22 and 1/4 in long
*smiles all the time!
*starting to really coo and make noise
*sleeps 4 to 8 hour stretches at night which is WONDERFUL
*Takes forever to be put to sleep for the night (like 1 to 3+ hours sometimes)
*size 1 diaper
*0-3 mo clothes
*HUGE mamma's girl
*hates her swing
*starting to love her play mat
*loves her binkie
*HATES her carseat (which makes it near miserable to go ANYWHERE)
*is such a joy to be around!

She had to have shots at her appointment which was totally heartbreaking. I hate shots and would have totally taken all of them for her if I could've. She had 1 oral and 3 shots in her squishy little thighs. I've never seen her cry so hard. It was so sad. Since then, she has been fussier, had a fever, but has also slept a lot. I'm grateful for that and think that's probably what she needs.

Here's a story for ya. It's embarrassing and made me feel like the worst mom on the planet, but I want to document it. The night of her shots, I gave her some Tylenol at 6 pm. The paper said every 4 to 6 hours so I was going to give her some more just before bed. Well, when that time came around, I was looking at the bottle and was 99.9 % sure of the correct dosage but last second decided to look at the paper the doctor gave me that shows the correct dosage just to make sure. When I looked at it, my heart sunk. The dosage said 1.25 ml and I am near positive that the dose I gave her at 6 earlier that night was 2.5 ml. I had accidentally doubled her dose. I went upstairs to ask my mom if Kinley was going to be ok. Neither of us knew for sure and I was worried because that was the first day I was even allowed to give her any Tylenol. It was close to 11 that night so it had already been in her system for like 5 hours. We decided to call my mom's friend, also a neighbor whom happens to be a nurse just to check. She was at work and didn't answer. So we decided to call a nurse at the hospital, she then told us to call poison control because she wasn't sure. This whole time I am just angry at myself and also prayyyying that I didn't have to take my baby in to get her stomach pumped or something crazy. Talk about feeling like a crappy mom. I know we all make mistakes but medicines should not be one of them, and I had done just that. When I gave her the first dose I even re read the paper like 7 times and checked the dose before I gave it to her but I am sure I gave her more than the recommended amount. Anyway, back to poison control. We call them, and long story short, after they do some calculations, Kinley was and would be just fine. They just said to wait before giving her her second dose. I went back to my room and let a good cry out because I felt so so bad. If something were to have happened to her, it would have been my fault and I don't think I would have been able to forgive myself if something were to have happened. I didn't want to put her down for a second. She was running her first fever, was whimpering and crying between waking up, and I could tell she just didn't feel well. I was slightly paranoid about it all and even though she slept good, I still woke up multiple times to check on her. Ugh, talk about scaring the crap outta me, and feeling like the WORST mom. Who has to call poison control when their baby is 2 months...oh..me. Anyway. She's doing a little better today but just seems like she wants to just sleep sleep sleep all day. Poor little peanut. :(

Here's a few recent pictures of her.

Looks like she's wearing a bonnet or something but she's just laying on the flower part haha

Loving her play mat and full of smiles!

My sweet baby

Tender moments. I love seeing Caleb as a dad and when he holds Kinley. Heart is in a puddle on the floor.

I end up having to sit in the back a lot when we go anywhere. Baby girl hates her seat so sometimes me by her calms her down some. It's still fun and I ALWAYS enjoy the moments me and Caleb get to get out for a while. He is such a funny guy and we always have a hoot.

A bittersweet day

Today my sister and closest friend (besides Caleb of course) moved to another state. I've been weepy and have had cry sessions because I am just going to miss her dearly! We text daily and would get together multiple times a week. She's been one of my biggest supporters in my life. I am going to definitely miss our Idaho Falls days, Kash, shopping trips, errands ran, grocery shopping together, going to lunch, hanging out at home with our babies, and just everything we would do. We I swear have minds like a set of twins and think the exact same with everything. We NEVER fight and get along so great. I am happy for her and her family to start this chapter of their lives yet I will miss her tons. I am looking forward to them coming back up to visit, or me going down there to make new memories in Utah. I missed you before you even left sister! Love you!

Half way there--weight loss post

I know its probably annoying that I keep talking about my weight loss, but I just wanted to document it for myself and also because this is something that makes me very happy. I'll keep it short and sweet.

First picture was me at Christmas last year. I was at my heaviest I've ever been. It was also about 2.5 months before I became pregnant. I was unhappy with how I looked and pretty insecure. Second picture was me at 39 weeks pregnant and the day I gave birth to Kinley. 10 pounds heavier than the first picture. And then 3rd picture is me 7 weeks postpartum and 30 pounds lighter than my pre pregnancy weight and first picture. I'm down about 2 pant sizes and that shirt I haven't worn since a little after high school. It's crazy to put the pictures next to each other. It really shows the difference and progress you've made. I am so happy with myself. Food is key. I really have just been watching my portions, drinking more water, and I'm sure breastfeeding is helping too. I would LOVE to lose at least another 20 to 30 pounds. That would put me in the healthy range for my height. I feel so much better and more confident than I have in years. My body is far from perfect, especially since having a baby, but I just want to feel good, be healthy, and look half decent in clothes. One day at a time. I'm really hoping this is the year I can get the rest of this dreaded weight off that I've been carrying around with me for years. I'm not going shopping for new clothes till I do! I got this! 

Kinley's blessing day

Yesterday 1/10/16 was Kinley's blessing day! The day before all she did was cry seriously all day long so I was worried that the day of her blessing was going to be rough. I prayed good and hard that it would be a good day, that she would be happy, that I would feel good, and that it would be a special day. It was all of that. It couldn't have gone better.

Hard to get a decent picture cause she was moving. She also had on tights and little white shoes. So pretty!

Most all of the families showed up on both sides. Caleb's dad even came which meant a lot to us. I'm so grateful that Caleb holds the priesthood so that he could be the one to bless her. He did such a great job and gave her a beautiful blessing. I'm a proud wife.

After sacrament meeting, we headed over to Big Juds. We held it there since there was more room than our house, and it was able to seat everyone. It worked out perfect. We had pulled pork sandwiches, side salads, jello's, vegetable trays, and chips. For drinks, we just used the fountain drinks which was nice since everyone could choose what they wanted. For dessert, we had ice cream and my mom had made chocolate cake. It pays to have hook ups with someone from a restaurant. Caleb's boss is awesome and we appreciate him for letting us use the building, drinks, ice cream, and help for the food.

The day went great and Kinley didn't cry hardly at all the whole day. It's like she just knew it was a special day for her! I'm so proud of my little family. :)

We bought a house!!

The time has finally come!! Me and Caleb have bought our very first home! We are THRILLED. Since moving in with my parents we had been searching online for a home. NOTHING was standing out to us and I especially was getting frustrated because finding a home, then closing on a home can take a while and I didn't want to be here for a way long time. We kinda put house hunting on hold when we had Kinley. But after a few weeks, we decided to look again. Caleb ended up finding a home online that looked realistic compared to any others we had looked at. We met up with our realtor at the house and took a look. It was below our price range which was awesome, location was better than we had anticipated, and it was a newer home (built in 2007) so it had what we wanted. We looked at one more to compare and have seen other homes in the past but this seemed right. We put in an offer. We negotiated through the week of Christmas. The sellers accepted our counter offer! We are now going through the process of all the paperwork and bank stuff. We close on February 12th! I feel like everything is falling into place. The house couldn't be more right for what we need. Everything from price, location, inspection, and doing all the paperwork has been great and easy! A little side note that is kinda funny. We knew that the sellers still lived there when we set a time to look at the house although they left and were gone while we went to look at the house. While going through, my mom said, "hey! This is so and so's house!" All the pictures on their walls were of a family that we knew. In fact, the guy, was my best friend all through grade schools older brother. His family is also in our ward at the moment. Haha I had no clue they lived there. I wondered if it would make the process of buying harder or awkward but it's been just fine! What are the odds. Kinda funny. Anyway, we are gearing up for a move here in about a month. We are going to re paint the house, and are keeping our eye open for some furniture. I'm so dang excited! I can't wait to have a garage so I don't have to scrape snow off my car, a walk in closet where we'll have space for our clothes, a master bathroom, a nice kitchen, a yard to play with Libbie in or have a weenie roast, and best of all, WINDOWS! haha I will have lots of windows to see out of. All those were on our list and we got it all. It's a 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom, 2 car garage home. 1140 sq ft, located in a nice area of a podunk little town called Ririe Idaho haha. It's a great starter home. My dad has been a HUGE help with this house stuff. I've learned more about homes than I thought I ever would. It's been fun too! We can't wait!! I'll post pictures when we get moved in.

Motherhood and postpartum checkup

Motherhood so far has been one of the hardest, most time consuming, exhausting, best things I've ever experienced. Kinley for the past good week or so has become quite the fussy baby. I think she is becoming colicky. I knew being a mom would have it's challenges but I doubt anyone will really know what it's like until they experience it for themselves.

Like today. I think I woke up at least 6 times last night to tend to Kinley. I finally just get up this morning to start the day. I'm already exhausted from getting what feels like no sleep. Baby cries. I feed her, and change her. Baby cries. I rock her to sleep. I use this opportunity to hop in the shower. The second I get in, I can hear baby crying again. Caleb gets her. She cries off and on while I'm in the shower. I brush my teeth and I get out to tend to my screaming child. This afternoon was the only chance to get Caleb's hair cut before he had to go to work since he's blessing Kinley tomorrow (pray that she doesn't just scream the whole time). So I feed baby again and she dozes off. I use this time to cut Caleb's hair. Just as I get started baby wakes up and starts to cry. I'm covered in cut hair constantly going over to put her binkie in. Baby is screaming at this point and only half of Caleb's hair is cut. I pick her up, rock her to sleep, lay her down, and get back to Caleb's hair. The second I do, she wakes up and is screaming. I decide to just hurry and cut it. Bad idea, she cried so hard she like chokes. The girl has a set of lungs for sure. I stop cutting hair, pick Kinley up, rock her to sleep. I only needed about 3 more minutes to finish. I lay her down. she starts to scream, so I rush through to finish Caleb's hair. My hair has now completely dried and is a frizzy mess. I feed baby again and she falls asleep. I lay her down so I can spend 5 minutes on my hair to tame the hot mess. The second I put her down, she wakes up, starts to cry. Caleb tends to her while I hurry and do a quick straightening on my hair. I go back to my crying Kinley. I finally decide to give up on trying to get ready to head out to run some errands. It's just not worth it. I give up on attempting to do my piled up laundry. I give up trying to make myself look half decent today. I wrap up my baby and she is only content when I hold her. Today has been like every day this last week. Exhausting. I have cried from pure and utter exhaustion, feeling like a bad mom because my baby doesn't seem content, frustration, and then guilt because I got frustrated. Some times being a mom is hard. I never fully understood what other mom's meant when they said they couldn't get ready for the day, or was just exhausted from their morning, etc. I now know. Although there are plenty of hard trying moments, there are also very great moments that make me cry happy tears because I feel so blessed. Moments like when Kinley see's me and smiles. Although it's hard, I do secretly love the fact that I her mom is the only one that can really calm her down. She knows her momma. I love the morning snuggles. I love tending to her. Feedings are special, rocking her to sleep, her tight grasp on my fingers, getting her dressed in her cute little outfits, tender moments when she just stares at me and seems so content that she is with me. It's the smallest things that make me feel completely in love with my babe. I am so grateful and blessed to be her mom. She really is a special and precious little thing. We love her so much!

Cute as can be! 

The tender moments that make me feel like I am doing something right.

First time to church! And it was awful to say the least. haha Sacrament was pretty good, then the rest of the time I hung out in the mothers lounge because she was so fussy. I ended up leaving church early since there was no point going to class 30 min before it ended with a crying baby.

More tender moments. I love morning snuggles. She seems most happy in the mornings.

She broke out in baby acne this past week. Just time time for her to be blessed tomorrow! :/ She's still a cutie though!

Smilin at her momma ;)

I had my 6 week postpartum checkup on Thursday. A little tmi here. I am still bleeding since giving birth. My doctor didn't love that and had me get another ultrasound. Things checked out good. My doctor said my lining was thin which typically means my hormones are still just pretty out of wack and just trying to regulate still. I'm supposed to give it two more weeks before they give me estrogen to stop my bleeding. Pray I don't have to do that because he said a lot of the times estrogen will dry up your milk. Besides that, the appointment went good. I'm down 28 pounds below my pre pregnancy which is a miracle to me. No clue how this is happening, but I love that it is! I really love my doctor. He makes me feel so comfortable and good. He loved seeing Kinley too. I'm sure it's rewarding to them to see the babies they care for and deliver. I will for sure be going to him for future babies. 

2015 in a nutshell

2015 started out very hard and ended absolutely great. Here's 2015 in a nutshell!

January

-Went snowboarding with Caleb at Kelly Canyon.

-Switched doctors again and had more infertility appointments

February

-No pictures from this month. Definitely a rough month. We both were pretty sick from infertility meds and I took more time off from work than I wanted too because of it. 

March

-Hard yet amazing month.

-My grandpa passed away from a long battle of cancer.

-That same week we had to go down to Boise for Caleb's work.

-While in Boise we got treated to an ice hockey game and had our own suite.

-The day after we got back from Boise was the day of my grandpa's funeral in Carey.

-A rough week of infertility disappointments. The week we thought IVF was our last option...

-Was the same week we found out we had indeed became pregnant! Amazing moment and best news we had ever received!

April

-Had our first ultrasound and saw baby at 7W 6D for the first time. Also amazing!

May

-The month we announced our news to social media. Never had so much support from people in our lives!

-I ended up quitting my job due to morning (all day) sickness and focused on keeping myself well to carry this baby.

June

- Was really sick that month. Basically took it easy and hung out at my moms since she was done with work for the summer.

-Our apartment had again flooded.

July

-Found out we were having a GIRL!!

-I turned 23!

-Caleb worked A TON this month.

August

-Me and Caleb headed up to a cabin in Island Park for his family reunion.

-I developed the WORST pregnancy rash known to man.

-Failed two glucose tests.

-Caleb again worked a lot this month.

September

-Me and Caleb celebrated 5 years of marriage!

Me and my sister took a day trip to Wyoming for boxes of baby clothes.

-I had to take my 3rd glucose test at the hospital. 3 hr one.

October

-I had my baby shower

-Took maternity pictures

-Ended up moving out of our apartment and into my parents. This was very stressful and hard since I was 35 weeks pregnant at the time.

November

-Celebrated Thanksgiving early with the Niederer side.

-I gave birth to our sweet Kinley Ray the day before Thanksgiving. Best day of our lives yet.

-Caleb turned 26

December

-Celebrated Christmas first time as a family.

-Baby turned 1 month old.

-Basically figured out this whole parent thing

A lot had happened in 2015. Best of all, we started our family. I can't wait for 2016 and have a feeling it's gonna be a good one. We have a lot of great things to look forward too! 

Happy new year!!